A big game hunter, a trust buster and one of our greatest Presidents, this mand used his “Big Stick” to change the world. All he wanted to do was stuff and mount some ladies…
You’ve seen my face on Mount Rushmore, but wait till you see my face when I mount you.
I’d like to finish plowing your canal.
I think the nickname Rough Rider pretty much explains it all.
The only monopoly I approve is my lips’ monopoly on your body.
I’d love to bust all over your trust.
I’d perserve your ass as a national landmark so everyone can enjoy it’s natural beauty.
I don’t just “walk softly” with my big stick.
I’d like to dock my Great White Fleet in your port.
I’m on safari for big game booty and I’ve got yours in my sights.
After tonight, Teddy Bear won’t be the only toy in your bedroom named after me.
also, thanks to Jenny P for the idea of Teddy!
4 years ago
Not so historical, but given the test of time, someday youths will be reading all about his role as a Governor. Brick Hardmeat, Rock Squatthrust, Max Pushsteel, Steel McIronside. Whatever name you choose to call him, he remains the Governor of Gettin’ Some…
Pumping iron’s just a hobby. I’d rather be pumping your derrière.
I was in Commando, but if you get to know me, you’ll discover I’m a boxer-brief kinda guy.
I’m so full of testosterone, you’ll have to chew before you can swallow.
Come with me if you want my jizz.
I sculpted my body with years of push-ups, military presses and squat thrusts…and sometimes I went to the gym too.
May I inject you with my own HGH?
I’ve played a Terminator and I was in Predator, now I’d like to play your Inseminator.
The President’s Council on Physical Fitness and Sports recommends you “workout” vigorously with me 3 to 4 times a week for at least half an hour.
When I said, “I’ll be back,” I was giving your booty fair warning.
I’ll govern your g-spot.
4 years ago
In honor of St. Patty’s Day, here’s the Irish version of Cupid…St Patrick, The Saint of Sinning…
I’m so Irish, even my jizz is green.
You don’t need a four-leaf clover to get lucky with me.
Do you have a little Irish in you? Would you like some?
May I dip my finger in your pot of gold?
I might be as tall as a leperchaun, but I’m hung like a unicorn.
Irish I were in you right now.
There’s a pot of cock at the end of my rainbow.
I pinched you cause you’re not wearing green, but I’ll pinch myself if you come home with me tonight.
I banished all the snakes in Ireland…except for the one in my pants that I saved for you.
I’m better when you’re drunk.
4 years ago
He invented over 80 tricks and only 4 of those weren’t meant for the bedroom. He’s the Skater of Sin…
Tony Hawk’s real “Proving Ground” is my four-poster bed.
“The 900” is also the number of orgasms I give girls in a day.
I retired from vert skating so that I could get horizontal with you.
Just because I invented the Stale Fish, doesn’t mean I want to smell it all day.
I’d love to aerial your backside.
Buy my video game and you can play with me all day long.
Why fly with the eagles, when you can soar with this Hawk?
I wouldn’t mind face-planting in your vert ramp.
You might be as flat as my board, but I’d ride you all day long.
I’m here anytime you want to grind my frontside
4 years ago
He’s not cyrogenically frozen, but he was always stiff. He kept every girl he knew until Tomorrow Land and always gave them an Adventure Land. here he is, the Animator of Ass…
Trust me. When I slip you my Mickey, it won’t be a roofie.
I’d love for you to Steamboat my Willie.
I promise that when you’re in bed with me, you’ll never be a Sleeping Beauty.
My last girlfriend called me Thump Her.
I’d love to poke your “hontas”.
I created the Pirates of the Caribbean so I could raid your booty.
I promise you’ll want to spend all your time in Fantasy Land.
My dick’s bigger than the Matterhorn.
Actually, the happiest place on earth is my bedroom.
Have you ever played “Snow White and my 7 Inches”??
4 years ago
